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Drag Me To Hell
I’m late, I’m late, for a very important date
2009
Review: June 19, 2009
Director: Sam Raimi
Starring: Alison Lohman, Justin Long, Lorna Raver, Dileep Rao, Adriana Barraza
Hey, why not?
THE SETUP:
Young woman is cursed to be escorted brusquely to hell in three days.
DISCUSSION:
kay, it’s Sam Raimi, who made his name with the Evil Dead but has recently been in blockbuster land with the Spider-Man films. So now he’s delivering a small horror-comedy film that harks back to his old days. Great, let’s go.
We open in California in 1978 or something. This concerned couple show up at this mansion and ask the medium who resides there to take a look at their little tyke, who does seem to be in a bad way. But before they can reach for the children’s chewable aspirin, the floor cracks open and these wrinkly hands drag him to… can ya guess?
Now—present day! Our heroine Christine is at her job as a loan officer for some bank branch. She eyes the empty assistant manager desk hungrily, but her competition is smarmy Asian Stu, who is a little less ethical. Christine is told she has to make the tough decisions if she wants the job, so she denies the loan of this gross gypsy woman who has already missed two payments, hacks up yellow goo, needs a manicure, and steals all the desk candy. Well, wrong move. The woman shows up in Christine’s car for an outrageously protracted battle royale, including a little touch where the old woman gets her dentures knocked out, and in place of a bite gives Christine a rather repulsive kiss.
So bad stuff starts happening to Christine at regular intervals, and she soon deduces that she has been cursed. True dat. She’s going to endure three days of torment and then be dragged to Dayton, Ohio. Her torments are terribly brutal and often result in Christine getting bodily thrown across rooms. And then there’s the visions, like the old woman puking up maggots right into Christine’s open mouth. Like birds do.
But the gruesomeness is part of the comedy, and Raimi goes for the yuck factor with such gusto his enthusiasm becomes the humor. If there’s something gross, it IS going in Christine’s mouth. A preponderance of CGI during these moments diminishes their effect, and maybe that’s for the best. When you’re done watching the movie, remember: THAT was PG-13.
There are a number of other demented surprises, such as the talking goat, and the movie wheels around with such glee, the haunted house atmosphere is contagious. Also helping if the script’s wicked sense of humor. For example, when told that an animal sacrifice might appease the demon who has his sights on her, Christine wails “But I’m a vegetarian!” Then, after a few more torments, that adorable kitten doesn’t look that essential anymore. I'm going to keep this short to save most of the surprises for you.
That atmosphere is that of a Halloween haunted house, with something to jump out at you every few minutes. The only thing is, like a haunted house, its pleasures are fleeting. It’ll tickle you when you’re in the theater, and pass time like nobody’s business, but that’s about it. There’s nothing to think about once it’s over. Which, you know, has its place.
It’s fun in a packed theater with screaming, laughing people, but will also hold up fine on video. It goes down smooth but leaves you with nothing to chew on. Now I need a sandwich!
SHOULD YOU WATCH IT?
If you want. It’s fun. It’ll be fine on video.
